And I don’t feel like chasing the stuffs or the people when they come to me easily. May be I love suspicion. I love rough roads more than the smooth ones, may be. There are times I’d sit quietly with you and throwing a smile back at you would be the hardest thing for me to do. There are times when I feel numb about everything, from your touch to your smile to your love and to all the beautiful things of this world. There are times when my heart is so confused about every small act of the day from choosing red over black or black over red, from eating food to fill my stomach or just to drink and pass out.
My heart gets so confused that you’d get lost in me and rather than getting over me, you’d prefer to sit with me having a beer or two and help me entangle the web of confusion.
These times are beautiful to me cause I become a stranger to myself. I suddenly feel a different me inside of me. I suddenly get the urge to discover and dig deeper into myself and find out all the hidden selves.
These times are like the beautiful November rains which leaves me with a startled serene feeling in my heart and gives me a newer shade of myself.